The Secret Behind Empowering Yourself is Controlling Your Thoughts



Have you had an empowering experience before? What were the circumstances of your empowering experience? Was it a spiritual experience, a talk given by a motivational speaker or coach? Or even just a phone call from a former mentor who gave you advice on how to launch your business?

What did you feel when you were empowered? Do you think you can feel that way again when the same situation occurs?

For most of us, the meaning of “being empowered” means having “positive thoughts, beliefs and feelings about something, someone or a situation that we find ourselves in”. More often than not, people equate being empowered with a “particular feeling of positivity” or sometimes, “euphoria”.

Let’s just say that when we feel empowered, we have that feeling of being energetically boosted, of being able to take on the world and any challenges that come our way.

Fair enough, so does that mean that we need to seek out only positively minded people to feel empowered? Not all the time. The feeling of being empowered is more of an innate ability and disposition to generate positive results for others and us. How exactly are we going to do that?

Simple -- we must learn “to control our thoughts, beliefs and feelings”. And that valuable information I’d like to share with you here.


How to be Empowered by Controlling Your Thoughts, Beliefs and Feelings

Tip #1:  Identify and understand first how you create or harbor your thoughts, beliefs and feelings.

Take a long hard look at your current thoughts, beliefs and feelings. How did you form them? Are these originally your thoughts, belief systems and feelings, or did you adopt them you’re your parents, mentors, bosses, colleagues, friends, even popular culture and traditional societal norms?  Do you feel they still hold true to you in this day and age? 

List down all the thoughts, beliefs and sometimes, feelings that you believe define you. For instance, you may believe that you are super-smart and that you can take on any challenge thrown at you. Rank each one of them according to priority.

Beside each thought and belief that you have listed down, indicate which one is empowering and which one is not.

Again, we should be guided on what is empowering to us. What might be empowering for some might not be empowering for us, however, a thought and a belief cannot be empowering for us if that thought and belief is detrimental or degrading to other people. True empowerment uplifts not only a person’s psyche but also their reputation in the eyes of others.


Tip #2: Work only on those thoughts, beliefs and feelings that are empowering for you.


Make a second list of all the thoughts and belief systems that you believe will be empowering for you. Now as indicated under Tip #2, those empowering thoughts and beliefs happen to be so because they uplift your feelings, demeanor and even, the way you relate and conduct business with others.

In my experience, empowering beliefs and thoughts are not relying nor based on the weaknesses and frailties of others. Rather, our competitive edge is based on our “ability to control our thoughts, feelings and beliefs” in order to make us feel and think truly empowered.

Which brings us to.....

Tip #3:  Train our minds and hearts to feel empowered by engaging in the following activities:

Prepare a list of positive affirmations for every thought or belief that you have listed down. Start each sentence with a firm and positive declaration of your intent, such as –

I will only think of positive thoughts every minute of the day.

I intend

I manifest

I create

I empower myself

I definitely project

I declare

I confirm 100%

I assert


Action Step : Once you have listed down your positive affirmations, proceed to –

  • Verbally saying these affirmations at least three times a day (when you wake up, around lunch, and before you go to bed) or as often as you can and even while doing mundane tasks (washing the dishes, walking or cycling to work, in a queue waiting to be served at a coffee place, etc.
  • Designate a quiet place for you to meditate on those affirmations for at least 10 – 20 minutes a day in the morning and probably again in the evening. Sometimes, I like to listen to some good, relaxing music when I’m meditating (personally, I find music with some binaural beats strangely relaxing.

Another way to effectively control our thoughts and beliefs in order to empower ourselves is...


Tip #4:  Remove any judgments that limit our potential to do great and positive things.

Let me explain.

We start learning to judge people as early as when we were kids. These could be a carry-over from our upbringing by our parents, our interactions with friends and colleagues, and what we see in popular mass media such as TV and the Internet.

The problem is judgments not only limit our view of the world but it also gives us negative feedback that lowers our capacity to empower ourselves. When you judge someone, you actually put a label on that someone – and that label or information might not even be true.

We can meditate also on these judgments and see how we can remove them from our psyche.

Now for the practicum of what we have learned.

Tip #5 To empower ourselves, we need to engage in empowering activities that would benefit us as well as others.

Part of being an IT Girl Coach is to support other women entrepreneurs realise their true potential – that true success is within themselves. 

Activities to empower you and others: 

  • Be committed to being excellent at your work.
  • Sharing some of your expertise by engaging in volunteer work or supporting an organisation you believe in. 
  • Take one day off every week to recharge your brain, or engage in a long holiday with your hubby or loved one to have some downtime and celebrate your achievements.
  • Start writing a blog that will provide content that people can learn from. The blog could also be an inspirational one where you can share your personal views, ideas and ways on how to become successful in business.
  • Engage in a new hobby or skill

That's all for today gorgeous! What idea are you going to implement today to help you to live an empowered life and business?

Jess xx

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